Trashy's World

…and the MotherCorp should come to grips with the fact that Grapes should be shown the gate to the bench.

I know this won’t make me popular with the Timmies crowd out there (no insult intended to those of you who like that swill, but you can’t help having poor taste in coffee!), but really, can anyone even follow what he spouts on about anymore? He is so fricking right wing that he makes Glenn Beck look like Bill Moyers.

C’mon folks, he is a blowhard, racist, fascist who knows precious little about hockey – the subject of which he is supposed to be an expert on! To make up for this lack of understanding of the modern game, and to cover up his increasing dementia, he uses his rant to bitch about Europeans, lefties, politicos and whomever else doesn’t agree with ol’ Grapes!

Now, I have not always been “anti-Don”. Coaches Corner was once a good segment that focussed on HOCKEY and had guests who talked about HOCKEY –  but it has devolved into a wandering bitch-fest about whatever is up Don’s butt that night… with an obligatory weekly gush and cry about the military.

He appeals to the lowest common denominator and that is the only reason the CBC puts up with him. He sells ad space.

But he has to go, and now is the time time. Right now.

The season is over (Congrats Hawks!) and the Canadian mindset will soon tune to summer mode. Hockey gets pushed to the back burner for a few months so the timing is right.

But they can’t simply show him the way to the gate with boxes in his arms! Noooo… imagine the hue and cry! And Grapes himself would happily stoke those flames until the CBC backed down for fear of a boycott and the loss of advertising bucks. So here’s what you do.

First, offer him a very generous buy-out package – much more than he is worth.  But more importantly, they have to be sure to stroke his huge ego by arranging for him a “speaking tour” – complete with PR hacks and a small entourage of cooing followers. And pick up the tab for the whole shot. Cherry would agree to this, I think, as he would still be able to utter all that swill about how the politicos are ruining everything and if important decision were left up to him and his beloved military, then Canada would go back to being that down-home redneck-friendly place that he once imagined it to be!

Yes, he would still have an audience, but it would be much smaller and thus less damaging than the millions who tune in to him every week during the hockey season. The folks in the Legion halls, old folks homes and middle-of-nowhere community centres and hockey rinks (read – places where the ridings are held by the CPC) are already ardent admirers of the jerk, so no further damage would be done.

Better yet, ship him overseas to entertain the troops! Kind of a USO thing like they do in the States! Man, that might be just the weapon our troops need to crush the Taliban! Put his blathering, meandering rants on loud speakers and blare it at full volume wherever it is believed there may be Taliban hiding… THAT would be better than any other ammo you can imagine!

Trashy – doing his part to help the mission overseas!

PS – If the Hawks can win the Cup 49 long years, then the Leafs will be next! Woo-hoo! I’m reserving my spot on the parade route now!

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ROTFL!

http://tsn.ca/columnists/dave_hodge/?id=321752

Dave read this on TSN this afternoon.

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TSN’s Dave Hodge sounds off on all the hockey issues of the day in Hodgemail. Write in to answer Dave’s weekly question and watch the NHL on TSN on Sunday afternoon to see if he reads your response.

With the first round of the Stanley Cup playoffs in the record books, Heritage and Official Languages Minister James Moore caused a little bit of debate earlier this month when he wrote, “The Canucks are Canada’s team in these playoffs,” in a tweet.

What someone forgot to tell him was the Montreal Canadiens – along with the Canucks – were also alive and well in the postseason grind.

Well, there’s no debate over Canada’s team now.

With stunning seven-game victories over the President’s Trophy-winning Washington Captials and the defending Stanley Cup Champion Pittsburgh Penguins (and the Canucks eliminated by the Chicago Blackhawks) the bleu, blanc et rouge are the toast of the nation – with Canadiens fans from Montreal to St. John’s to Victoria singing, ‘Ole, ole, ole…” together in unison.

Hey, are you singing too?

Are you putting away that Leaf jersey for the summer and putting your hands together for Les Glorieux?

Are you taking the Senators licence plate cover off your car and flying a Canadiens flag?

Are you taking a break from the Taylor vs. Tyler debate in Edmonton to cheer for P.K. Subban?

With that all said, here’s Dave’s question to you: “If you weren’t a Habs fan before, are you now?”

“To convert from the Leafs to the Habs would be heresy. After all, we Leaf fans get the ladies because they know we’re loyal.” Josh – New Brunswick

“I’m a hardcore Flames’ fan, but I’ve extended by love to all NHL teams that wear red home jerseys with a big “C” on them.”  Ryan – Lethbridge, AB

“I don’t like this argument that Canadian fans have to cheer for Canadian teams. What’s wrong with cheering for Canadian players?” Trevor – Alberta

“I would prefer to have my eyes gouged by rabid bats soaked in fermented vinegar than cheer for Montreal. Any enemy of the Habs is a friend of mine.” John – Ottawa

“I guess I’ll join the bandwagon. I can’t afford to pay to see the Leafs lose, so I’ll cheer for a team with heart, passion and a long history of success.” James – Toronto

And Dave’s Reply To All:

Another Torontonian explained to me that the reason he’s not hoping for the Canadians should not be misunderstood. He just thinks Philadelphia’s story is the more uplifting of the two. So he wants me to believe that he’s cheering for Philly without actually cheering against Montreal.
“How very diplomatic”, I said to this lifetime Leafs fan, “but you hate Philadelphia.”
Ah, he said, “but not as much as I hate Montreal.”
I believe it’s all in fun, except for the rabid bats.

Habs suck!

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Cool. But it woulda been better with Stompin’ Tom…

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FORTY-EIGHT year old Chris Chelios has signed with the Thrashers.

He has to play in the minors until he is called up, but you can betcha that he will get the call before the end of the season!

Woo-hoo! Go old guys, go!

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Gawd – I LOVE this crazy country so freakin’ MUCH sometimes!

Nowhere else in the world would the announcement of the members of a national sports team garner so much rapt attention. Say what you want about the dissection and analyses of the choices for the World Cup teams (you know, the tournament that Canada almost never makes it to…) but Canada’s national obsession can go toe-to-toe with any other nation – bar none!

Yes, today at noon is the announcement of the members of the Men’s Hockey Team that will take to the ice in a few short weeks and try to recapture the gold medal in the one sport where we – Canada – see sour supremacy as our birthright!

It will be euphoria for those whose names are called and crushing disappointment for those left off a team that will have the rare opportunity to battle for gold in its home country.

No country cares more about hockey than Canada, or has the sheer number of world-class players to choose from. Star players will be left out. Debates will rage over who should or shouldn’t have been picked.

As Martin Brodeur recently put it: ”It is the ultimate for hockey.”

Steve Yzerman – a legend in his own right – and his team have agonised over the decision for months. There are really only a couple of sure things: Sid the Kid will be on the list as will Martin Brodeur. As for the rest, who knows? Though I think all three goalkeepers are pretty much no-brainers.

Yzerman will have to balance skill with toughness and offense with defense…. all the while ensuring that he has the right mix of players to have a good chemistry on the bench.

For what it’s worth – here is my prediction.

FORWARDS
Rick Nash
Sidney Crosby
Jarome Iginla
Dany Heatley
Joe Thornton
Patrick Marleau
Vincent Lecavalier
Mike Fisher
Ryan Getzlaf
Ryan Smyth
Mike Richards
Shane Doan

DEFENCEMEN
Chris Pronger
Scott Niedermeyer
Shea Weber
Mike Green
Drew Doughty
Duncan Keith
Jay Bouwmeester

GOALTENDERS
Martin Brodeur
Marc-Andre Fleury
Roberto Luongo

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Hee. Sens suck.

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TMLHC – Canada’s team.

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After almost 2 decades, Mats Sundin is hanging up the blades.

He was the face of my beloved Leafs for a long, long time and when he is inducted into the Hall, it will be in the Blue and White.

Tack, Mats

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My blue and white blood desperately wants this to work out. Phil Kessel is a class act. Talented. Young. Tough. Potential to lead us to the Promised Land… fer sur.

But something about giving up 2 first rounders and a second just does not sit right. Based on history, Kessel may be soft, end up on the sidelines for an extended period and all that has been given up will never be regained.

I hope I am being really paranoid.

On the up side, they kept Kaberle. All along I have been saying why give up a puck-moving d-man for picks, spare parts and potentials… Tomas is the real deal and would be a first liner and PP guy on ANY team… and I like his style… hope he is around for a long time to come.

The TMLHC – Canada’s team

I need a Cup.

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I frickin’ love this country.

First, there is a national debate on whether Hockey Canada should have been allowed to use the crests that it has used for a number of years on the sweaters worn by the team at the next years Vancouver Olympics. The IOC said no, so a search for a new logo was launched.

Now, splashed across the front pages of several of the MSM outlets today is – in living colour – the new crest and sweater(1) as designed by a First Nations person in B.C.
Taa-daa!

I couldn’t find a downloadable pic of sufficient quality to see the details in the crest, but they are pretty danged impressive (check out today’s G&M).

Other countries give this much attention to elections, wars, the economy, scandals, etc. But I have to wonder if the front page of the L.A Times would herald the coming of a new symbol for the U.S. basketball team. Or the Daily Mail making a huge issue out of the new jerseys to be sported by athletes representing the three lions in the rowing competitions.

I don’t think so.

This is so like Canada.   The economy is in the crapper. Massive forest fires and drought in the West. H1N1 flu. And THIS the biggest story on the front pages and around the water coolers?

Cool.

Go Canada go!

1. Note I say “sweater” and not “jersey”. “Jersey” is just not right in the context of hockey. Nor is the use of the term “locker room”. It’s a “dressing room”. Are we clear on this?

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