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parenting

Why work?

Actual conversation between my 7 year daughter and I yesterday.

Daughter: When are we going to Montreal?

Me: Well, I’m not going. You and your brother and Mommy are going next week. I have to go back to work on Monday.

Daughter: Why?

Me: Because my summer holidays are over and now it’s time for me to go back to my job.

Daughter: But why not just stay on holidays for the rest of the summer?

Me: I’d LOVE to. But I can only take so much time off each year because it is expected that I will return to work in order to earn more time off. That way I’ll be able to have another vacation next summer and we can come back to the cottage and do other cool stuff.
Plus, I have a job to do at work and some people are counting on me to do it. And I don’t want to disappoint them. I have responsibilities.

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Daughter: Then why don’t you get a different job where you can do fun stuff with us all of the time and still get paid? Like a fisherman or somebody who rakes beaches? That way you wouldn’t disappoint me.

Me: Ummmmm…
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So… anyone hiring? At my current salary and benefit levels, of course.

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Look what those good ol’ boyz are up to in Alberta!

Alberta parents will soon be able to cherry-pick what their kids can and cannot be taught in the province’s schools.

Think that gays and lesbians are hell-bound monstrosities sent to earth by Satan?

No worries!  You can pull your kid out of the class that teaches about sexual orientation (and I guess tolerance and human rights might be taught in these classes too!)

Think that humans were created by a big bearded guy who lives in the sky?

Piece of cake! That Grade 9 biology class where they teach that pesky little “theory” called evolution is NO place for little Johnny!

School boards will have to give parents written advance notice any time classes deal “primarily or explicitly” with religion, human sexuality and sexual orientation, or risk facing a human rights complaint as punishment..

This is obviously a move designed to keep the christian wackos happy and the back wood rednecks from reachin’ for their guns.

I have no problem at all with parents choosing how they want little Johnny or Jane taught. That’s what private schools are for.  But if you want to suck at the teat of publicly-funded education, then accept the curriculum as designed by the educators!

Next thing you know, they’ll have separate but publicly-funded school baords and schools based on religion or language!

Wait a minute, that’s Ontario!

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Parent versus non-parents, deuxième partie

I scribbled a post a while back that talked a bit about the differences between those of us who have propagated and those who have chosen not to. I received a bit of flack for calling non-parents “ignorant” and upon reflection, this was likely not the best word to use. But I stand by what I said in the text.

And I’m adding to it.

Unless they are mentally unbalanced or an addict of some ilk, a parent will do whatever it takes to care for the health of their child. They will lose sleep, work extra hours, sacrifice their own clothes so that the child can be adequately dressed. They will give them their last scrap of food when food is scarce.

They will take a bullet for them, jump in front of a train to save them, dive into icy waters to rescue them.

They will die for them.

And so it is for my kids. All of the above applies to me for any of the three of my kids.

Oddly, I didn’t want kids when I was in my 20’s and still more oddly, I feel that having them is a lifelong commitment. It won’t end when they are grown and on their own.

So when the well-being of one of them is threatened, I jump into rescue hero mode and do whatever it takes to pull them back from whatever poses the threat.

Some of you may be aware that we have had a bit of a health scare with my little boy over the past few months. After a “minor” (yeah, right) surgery, it seems that all is OK and his affliction can be attributed to a nasty little bacteria. But, Holy Cowabunga! The Resident-Love-Goddess and I have been on pins and needles! It isn’t until the health of your child is directly threatened that you are reminded of the strength of that bond between parent and child.

Another example.

My eldest subunit decided to turn vegetarian last summer. No problem – I totally respect that. There is evidence that points to that lifestyle being a helluva lot healthier than the one adopted by we carnivores!

As long as you eat the right things and take supplements, one can be a healthy little camper.

And therein lies the rub. No matter what her 4 parents tell her, she just-won’t-eat-properly! She’s not getting enough protein nor enough iron. We think that she is becoming anaemic as she is always sick and getting as pale as a ghost. But she just won’t listen.

The kid has been turning a maturity corner lately as she is getting excited about her post-secondary life. Her grades have picked up and even her attitude – while still FAR from ideal – seems to be improving.

But she is making herself ill by NOT eating properly and her parents are at their collective wit’s end!

And there is very little that we can do about it. She has to realise that being a vegetarian has health consequences if care is not exercised and she has to either fix her diet or go back to eating meat.

My kids’ – the toddler’s and the teen’s – health issues are very different but they are both realistically out of my control. I can take the little one to doctor appointments and the follow-up. I can suffer through 2 hours of waiting while he was in surgery. But his health was in the hands of the doctors and his own young body’s ability to heal itself.

For my teen, I can talk to her, plead with her, buy her foods and vitamins BUT the final decision is her’s.

I would do anything to fix either of their problems. Anything! If I believed in the existence of a soul, I would look up the red, horned guy in the phone book and try to do a deal!

And that, my friends, is a main difference between parents and non-parents. It isn’t the late nights or the cuddly times or thrill of hearing the first word or seeing the first step.

Those without kids will and can never feel the pain of their child and the resultant agony felt by the parent in knowing that in spite of your best efforts and in spite of doing everything “right”, that it is sometimes not enough. I can’t always “rescue” my kids – whether it be from poor eating habits or a nasty little bacteria.

And that pain is unlike any other.

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If everyone had a parent like this kid, psychiatrists would all be millionaires!

I had to say something about this vid that has been posted on YouTube and is garnering lots of attention – and criticism.

Seems a kid named David was having a hard time coming out of his anaesthetic after a visit to the dentist. So, dad, being the responsible parent his is, does the expected thing – and films it! Complete with little 8 year old David babbling, bobbing and generally looking like a poor kid who is going through a pretty disconcerting- if not terrifying – time.

I’m not going to embed the vid here – it was way to upsetting so if you do want to see it, you can click on the link to the G&M story above.

I find it amazing that parents find it funny when little *** is in distress, pain or some other state that isn’t at all pleasant. There have been vids circulating of kids falling asleep in their food, falling off bikes or other things (along the Funniest Home Video type of thinking) and now some idiot thinks it’s funny to see his kid all drugged-up.

Amazing. I should show this to my teen to demonstrate how things could be oh-so-much-worse for her!

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