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Culture and sport

Watched Pulp Fiction

I have been off cigarettes for over 8 years and haven’t had the urge to smoke for years… until last night when I watched Pulp Fiction.

What is it about that flick?

And what ever happened to Uma Thurman?

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The Hobbit!

Can’t wait!

I wonder if Will Ferrell makes an appearance as an Elf?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZEOM13UyZ0A

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Don Cherry’s time has passed…

…and the MotherCorp should come to grips with the fact that Grapes should be shown the gate to the bench.

I know this won’t make me popular with the Timmies crowd out there (no insult intended to those of you who like that swill, but you can’t help having poor taste in coffee!), but really, can anyone even follow what he spouts on about anymore? He is so fricking right wing that he makes Glenn Beck look like Bill Moyers.

C’mon folks, he is a blowhard, racist, fascist who knows precious little about hockey – the subject of which he is supposed to be an expert on! To make up for this lack of understanding of the modern game, and to cover up his increasing dementia, he uses his rant to bitch about Europeans, lefties, politicos and whomever else doesn’t agree with ol’ Grapes!

Now, I have not always been “anti-Don”. Coaches Corner was once a good segment that focussed on HOCKEY and had guests who talked about HOCKEY –  but it has devolved into a wandering bitch-fest about whatever is up Don’s butt that night… with an obligatory weekly gush and cry about the military.

He appeals to the lowest common denominator and that is the only reason the CBC puts up with him. He sells ad space.

But he has to go, and now is the time time. Right now.

The season is over (Congrats Hawks!) and the Canadian mindset will soon tune to summer mode. Hockey gets pushed to the back burner for a few months so the timing is right.

But they can’t simply show him the way to the gate with boxes in his arms! Noooo… imagine the hue and cry! And Grapes himself would happily stoke those flames until the CBC backed down for fear of a boycott and the loss of advertising bucks. So here’s what you do.

First, offer him a very generous buy-out package – much more than he is worth.  But more importantly, they have to be sure to stroke his huge ego by arranging for him a “speaking tour” – complete with PR hacks and a small entourage of cooing followers. And pick up the tab for the whole shot. Cherry would agree to this, I think, as he would still be able to utter all that swill about how the politicos are ruining everything and if important decision were left up to him and his beloved military, then Canada would go back to being that down-home redneck-friendly place that he once imagined it to be!

Yes, he would still have an audience, but it would be much smaller and thus less damaging than the millions who tune in to him every week during the hockey season. The folks in the Legion halls, old folks homes and middle-of-nowhere community centres and hockey rinks (read – places where the ridings are held by the CPC) are already ardent admirers of the jerk, so no further damage would be done.

Better yet, ship him overseas to entertain the troops! Kind of a USO thing like they do in the States! Man, that might be just the weapon our troops need to crush the Taliban! Put his blathering, meandering rants on loud speakers and blare it at full volume wherever it is believed there may be Taliban hiding… THAT would be better than any other ammo you can imagine!

Trashy – doing his part to help the mission overseas!

PS – If the Hawks can win the Cup 49 long years, then the Leafs will be next! Woo-hoo! I’m reserving my spot on the parade route now!

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What were the Dragons thinking???

I coached for the Gloucester Dragons for a number of years. Eight, to be exact.

I can only say that things must have changed in the league since I left a few years ago. The Dragons used to have a committed and sensible Executive – focused on teaching kids about the beautiful game, sportsmanship and on fostering a competitive spirit.

But, as covered heavily in the national media, the league has done a very, very silly thing.

From the League Handbook:

Scoring Limit
Respect your opponent: do not run up the score.
To prevent running up the score, a five-goal differential is the maximum allowed.
If at the end of a game there is more than a 5 goal difference in the score, the team that scored over 5 goals will have the results recorded as a loss when the game is recorded at the office.
Strategies coaches can use to avoid this problem include:
• Rotating players into other than normal positions;
• Passing the ball a number of times prior to a shot on goal;
• Kicking with the weaker foot;
• Reducing the number of players on the field;
• Kick at net only from outside the penalty box.

All for the “Strategies coaches can use…” part of this. If you are matched against a much weaker opponent, a good coach will employ these strategies. Put the strong kids in the backfield and put the weaker one up front and in the midfield. It usually works to curb embarrassing scores.

But no, some parent or parents have gotten their knickers in knots cuz little Jimmy or Jenny got upset because their side was blown out 12 – zip or something.

Well, OK, the winning coach did not do their job. Fine. But kids, life is about losing badly as well as winning gloriously. Better get used to that.

But from a sports perspective, coaches should not ever teach players how NOT to win. Seriously. I was never trained to do this. Instead, I was taught to use those techniques outlined above. Ain’t rocket science, really.

Do we want the players of a stronger side to spend the second half – up 4-0, to kick the ball into touch whenever they had possession?

THIS is coaching????

C’mon Dragons – reverse this silly policy – and now!

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Dennis Hopper

I feel like the grim reaper… first Gary Coleman, now Dennis Hopper… who was one of my all-time faves.

Loved him in Easy Rider and later in Apocalypse Now and Hoosiers… the consummate hippie. And he made me laugh.

Prostate cancer sucks, my fellow gentlemen. If you are 50+, GET CHECKED!!!!!! It is curable if caught in time. Don’t be stupid!

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What’choo talkin’ ’bout, Willis?

One of my fave child stars from bygone years, Gary Coleman, has died at an oh-too-young of an age of suffering a fall at home… he was only 42…

Lots of good memories of watching Diff’rent Strokes... and it’s contemporaries like Three’s Company, M*A*S*H* and WKRP in Cincinnati

Good times, man….

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Holy shit! It’s as cold as Harper’s soul here!

Yah, I know that this Tim Horton’s ad that has been airing recently has caused many a teary eye to be exposed, but really… what is that poor woman thinking…

She comes from a place where ice is found in drinks and snow is something they see only on TV when reception isn’t so great. And the hubby hands her a coffee and says “welcome to Canada” then leads the family out into a typical November day – snow, cold, wind and misery – and says:

Welcome home!

Sheee-it! If I was that chick, I’d be all “WTF were you thinking! We had a choice between Australia and HERE. And you chose HERE???? You’re one f***in’ sadistic SOB and I’m not looking at you or talking to you until you get me outta this hell hole!”

Or something like that.

Don’t get me wrong, I love the Land of the Ice and Snow… but man, if I was from a tropic clime…

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Weekend fun – Wile E. loses focus

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John Hughes – Don’t you forget about me…

One of the defining cultural figures of my gen has unexpectedly permanently chilled.

John Hughes made or was involved in the creation of a number of movies that were defining moments of my “coming of age” in the late 70’s and early 80’s.

I have always identified and commiserated with the characters in The Breakfast Club, Ferris Beuller and Pretty in Pink. Those flicks, along with The Big Chill and St. Elmo’s Fire pretty much clamped on to my in-between gen – as in between the Boomers and the Gen Xers.

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I still have a crush on Molly Ringwald.

10103186Thanks to da man. His work will be missed. I laughed.

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