This week’s CPC attack ads – EXCLUSIVE!!!

With the polls saying that the Harperites are in real trouble in many previously “safe” ridings, Canadians can expect to see and hear a whole new suite of anti-Trudeau ads over the final days of this looooooonnnnggggg campaign.

My operative – let’s call him or her “The CPC War Room’s pizza delivery guy’s barber’s aunt” snuck these tidbits out to me in a used X-large pizza box still smelling of olives and dripping with bacon grease…

  • “Justin Trudeau – as Prime Minister he will cut income-splitting to fund injection sites in brothels”!
  • “Justin Trudeau – he like babies and he likes to eat pizza – he will FORCE FEED YOUR BABIES PIZZA!”
  • “Justin Trudeau – he want to put toll booths on Tim Horton drive-thrus to fund his ‘free-pot-for-schoolkids’ Program!
  • “Justin Trudeau – he will appoint an ISIS terrorist as  the Minister of National Defense!”
  • “Justin Trudeau – he almost drowned once when he was a kid. He was way over his head!”
  • “Justin Trudeau – as a drama teacher, he sold pot to kids on field trips to local brothels while reciting lines from Hamlet!”
  • “Justin Trudeau – his Dad was named Pierre. Which is French for “stone”. Which makes “just not ready” Justine a stoner who wants to inject drugs into your pizzas!

The only question is whether they will run out of days before ad ideas…

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