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October 5th, 2009:

When is it appropriate to take a sick day?

Inspired by this CBC piece reporting on the skyrocketing number of sick days being taken by OC Transpo drivers (no, I’m not surprised), I thought I’d express my opinion on when it is – and is not – OK to call in sick.

Go ahead and make the call

  1. You have been throwing up like an engineer during frosh week
  2. You have been expelling the contents of your bowels in a non-stop fashion.
  3. Coughing so badly that you can be heard by staff 2 floors above or below. Or, so badly that you sound like a smoker with emphysema on a bad day.
  4. Stuff is coming out of your nose that is green, yellow or red.  And you have to rid your sinus passages of these wonderful liquid every 60 seconds or so.
  5. You pass out during a Board. For non-guvvies, that is a meeting where one is grilled for an hour or so to determine whether or not you should get a promotion. It’s a pretty important thing to stay awake for.
  6. You have been diagnosed with something really communicable. Like Ebola, for instance.

Um, I think you’re well enough, don’t you?

  1. You are using the pretence of being sick as a non-strike job action (see opening paragraph).
  2. You just called the course to see if there was a 9 am tee-time available.
  3. Avoidance of a meeting.
  4. Coughing less than 3 times per hour for a duration of less than 5 seconds per occurrence.
  5. Your fave team has an afternoon game.
  6. You’re well enough to go for your morning run.
  7. You HAVE to use all of my annual allotment of sick days.
  8. Your justification is “aw, I NEED a mental health day!”

Any others?