Ten things Trashy would rather do than be a sen fan.

1. Vote for Canada’s neutered government
2. Eat glass soaked in camel urine and otter dung
3. Convert to Christianity
4. Adopt a pet. Any pet. But especially a dog.
5. Send a donation to GWB
6. Have a balloon filled with H2SO4 blow up in my front pocket
7. Slit a cut down my abdomen, roll around in iodine and then go face first down a water slide
8. Give up coaching soccer
9. Give up beer and wine – completely
10. Become a vegan

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